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Chip Wilson Can Kiss My Fat Yoga Ass: A Lululemon Ambassador Speaks Out

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I was leading a yoga teacher training when I heard the news. Lululemon founder, Chip Wilson had said that "Frankly, some women's bodies just don't actually work [for Lululemon yoga pants]. It's about the rubbing through the thighs and how much pressure is there." In the room with me that day were two lovely employees of Lululemon who looked incredibly embarrassed at the comment and gave a weak smile to the rest of the class... who were all women. They looked at me for a response, and I said the first thing that came to mind: "Chip Wilson can kiss my fat yoga ass."

As a former two-time ambassador to Lululemon, I had been proud to wear the clothing and felt supported by the company who asked me to teach on the occasional Saturday to yoga-hungry shoppers. As an ambassador in Denver to the first Lululemon store in the state, they even hosted a CD release party for me when my first album came out. In New York City, I was an ambassador for the opening of their Union Square location and I was psyched when they asked me to perform for their opening. Nice people.

So what the hell happened?

Over the years, I've witnessed some strange things within the company. Many of my yoga teaching friends have gotten jobs there because, lord knows, it's damned near impossible to pay the rent solely through teaching yoga. Of all the people I've known to work for Lululemon, few have worked there for very long. Most have left very unhappily citing problems with upper management and this weird, cult-like pressure to go through the Landmark Education Training -- which is the "gift" employees receive on their anniversary. I didn't feel comfortable with this notion, as any idea of trying to encourage a group of people to think the same way feels too much like a cult to me, so I started to back off with my involvement with them. Eventually, there was news of someone being killed in a Lululemon store, reports of see-through pants, and a continuous escalation of the prices of their goods... not to mention outrage about founder Chip Wilson's beliefs which "include favoring child labor, his disdain for the ability of the Japanese to speak English, a love of Ayn Rand, and his opinion that The Pill created a generation of divorce-shattered women now seeking empowerment through yoga."

I gathered up all my Lululemon one day and gave it to some underpaid front desk workers at my home yoga studio in New York. I knew they weren't going to be able to afford those pants, and by that point, I had realized something. Lululemon had been preying on the kindness of the yoga community for quite some time. I'd had quite enough.

For all our shortcomings and the hippie-laden rumors, yoga people are nice people. We tend to be the kind of folks who are eager to help, eager to smile and eager to do good things for the world and other people. One of the things built into the yoga practice is the idea of seva, or service. When yoga people are asked to do something, they often not only step up to the plate, they generally go way beyond it.

What a better way to garner a crew of shiny, happy, underpaid people who would be willing to work hard and not question the corporate dictate than to go after kind-hearted yogis?

Bingo.


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This used to be me, too (see pic of me as the Union Square NYC ambassador). I have taught free classes for Lululemon all across the country, and only been paid in sweat-shop-labor-made Whisper tanks. I felt like it was good exposure, and I always try to teach when it's asked of me, but eventually something didn't add up. Why wasn't I feeling good about participating in these "community building" events? Because they weren't for me, or for the students, they were for Lululemon.

I mean, it's great free advertising, right?

Get a bunch of people in a vacant store filled with nothing but Lululemon product and feed them 60 minutes of free, good quality yoga. And when they're just coming out of their yoga buzz-filled shavasana, turn on the lights and start up the cash registers. Ka-Ching!

Brilliant move. Except, the yoga teacher has just given up her Saturday and will probably go teach three more paid classes that day just to make what she needs to pay her electricity bill that week.

But let's not stray from the current debacle at hand. Chip Wilson -- after all the recent questionable press on Lululemon (my favorite being the Stephen Colbert rant) -- has taken a stab at the shape of women's bodies.

It makes me cringe. Literally cringe. A company who is supposedly meant to embrace the values of yoga has just missed one entire, basic principle of the practice:

That EVERYONE is accepted.

Everyone is accepted within the yoga practice. People whose thighs rub together are accepted. People whose thighs do not rub together are accepted. Short people, tall people, people of all ethnicities, and religious background... they're all accepted. Poor people, rich people. They're accepted, too. Yoga itself has zero investment in what you bring to the practice, only that you show up.

So when did yoga become the property of the wealthy and skinny? That's how Lululemon is defining their customer by pricing things so highly and criticizing the shape of women's bodies for not fitting into their clothing.

Excuse me?

Because I've seen some goddamn beautiful women in all shapes and sizes. And, pardon me, Chip, but my thighs definitely rub together, and I'm a size 12... almost too fat to be part of your demographic. Makes me wonder how I was ever chosen to be an ambassador.

Oh, that's right, because I could bring customers through the doors. By me squeezing my size 12 ass into your tiny pants -- which I have done, because they were free -- and showing up to teach free classes on a Saturday morning, I showed people that I was embracing your brand. So, they may have, too.

Well, not any more.

I have one last vestige of my Lulu-loving days left. A darling fall coat with a big cowl neck in grey that I absolutely love. It's the perfect weight, miraculously fits me well and I've worn it so often there's a hole in both pockets.

But, I'm not fooled any more. Chip, this is a two-way street. I've done a lot to help you further your so-called yoga-based brand. I was even there in New York to ring the bell at NASDAQ the day your company went public. If you're not going to accept me -- and my thighs! -- for who I am, then I reject all ties to you.

I'm hanging up my Lululemon hat. No more ambassadorship or sheer pants for me. If you're just as upset at this recent behavior by the founder and the company who claims to embody yoga, then stop putting your beautiful body in their ridiculously expensive sheer pants. Let's start standing for what is important to our value system as yoga practitioners... in all the ways we can.

I'll be giving my beloved grey coat to a homeless person who is cold here in New York City. I know they can't afford it, and it will serve them far better than it will serve me at this time (Like this great movement in response to similar behavior by Abercrombie). I encourage all of you to do the same. In the spirit of upholding the acceptance, openness and inclusiveness that yoga embraces, let's use our yogic powers to do what we can to tell Chip Wilson and Lululemon that we will not stand for this behavior, particularly when yoga has been so identified with Lululemon pants in recent history. We vote with our dollars, our actions and our behavior. Wear out what you have. Give away the rest.

Stop buying Lululemon.

The Real Reason to Have Perfect Hair

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I was always amazed, when writing for NBC's Style Goes Strong, at how well the hair articles did. It was tough, given the constant pressure of accruing pageviews, not to cater to the seemingly insatiable quest for tress perfection. Our jobs guru, Leslie Ayres, summed it up when she said, "I gave up thinking this would be lucrative for me when I saw that... whether we should wear bangs is more interesting to the reader than serious advice on getting a job."

I noticed the hair phenomenon everywhere: Photographer Bruce Weber remarked on its importance during his 92Y interview with Fern Mallis; the gazillion viewers for a recent YouTube how-to on wacky braids. As someone who clearly doesn't spend enough time worrying about her hair, it's baffling.

It took Marie C. Wilson, founder of Take Your Daughters & Sons to Work Day, to help me really understand what perhaps (I hope), is the underlying, unconscious impetus behind this obsession. It was at the TEDx Barnard event, where the theme "Rethinking Failure" challenged us to reframe our crash-and-burn moments. Filled with the thrill of defeat, I ran home to write about Jimmie Briggs' Failure-in-Action lesson; but it also made me want re-do my résumé to feature only the failures.

Screw this solipsistic I'm-so-great, proven-track-record stuff. What about the bleeding badges of courage? "Here's where I royally f-ed up and showed up anyway. Here's where I made a mistake and turned it around. Here's where I took lemons and made lemon sorbet" (hat tip to author Amy Ferris). Accompanying soundtrack: Elaine Stritch singing "I'm Still Here." Motto by Nietzsche.

Marie Wilson, who is now a sort of mentor-in-residence at Barnard, strode onto the TEDx stage and began talking about perfection. Ah, perfection -- that ideal women are always striving in vain to reach. Is it vanity? Probably more like self-flagellation (or preemptive measures against criticism).

Marie said she had one thing that was perfect: Her hair. She bent her head down, rubbed her hands all through her perfectly coiffed hair, vigorously messing it up. And poof, it returned to perfect with just a slight smoothing of her palm.

Oh! Enlightenment was dawning. But I called her anyway, to further clarify her points on coping with failure.

Create a Circle of Courage
Marie's first rule for following your dream, living large, stepping up, seemed to evolve from two primary sources:

• For women, the cultural ideal is still wife-and-mother, she explained. And there are big perfection issues around that. "They know so much more than we did, have to know so much more." She's observed this from her five children, two of whom are daughters. "It's overwhelming! How do they do it?" Communities on line help enormously. Community is crucial, she says.

• "Name your 5" someone said to her when she was forming The White House Project, an initiative to teach women leadership skills.

Determine who can support you in various ways: Tell you the truth, make you feel safe, root for you, advise, support, stick around, see you through.

"So much discouragement comes your way. Courage is embedded in encouragement," she pointed out. And the root? Someone else mentioned to me that coeur is heart in French. Duh!

So essentially, she is advising: Find the guardians of your heart. I suddenly recalled the startling rise in women's heart disease in recent years. As we are called to live bigger lives, guardians of our hearts are as much for our health as our hardiness.

"How do people who do any kind do pioneering work live? We have to have people who see us, and stand for us," Marie said. Sentinels of the soul, perhaps.

"Being seen is powerful," she noted. Indeed, there are all kinds of studies showing that babies and the elderly thrive much better with focused attention. Why should we who live between those two poles be any different?

Diversity counts: Assemble a group with a spectrum of age, race, class. This will give you a more comprehensive perspective on what you might come up against, and how to handle it.

Have a Daily Call: Regularly downloading what you're going through helps you let it go. Obsessing over failures keeps you stuck in them. "Get people in there who are committed to each other's lives," she adds. Building a community of courage will help you move forward much faster on your chosen path.

Internal GPS: Route Recalculation
There was a ping when Marie Wilson told me: "I have never had a job I didn't invent."

With technology driving the rapidly changing landscape, coupled with the Great Recession's impact on jobs, we all have to be Masters of Invention now.

She suggests taking a tip from GPS technology. (Personally, I love it when my GPS, whom I have named Alistair, says 'route recalculation.' He never says, "Hey, you can forget about finding this place!") What to do when you've made a mistake, a misstep... failed:
1. Do I have one thing that I can do about it?
2. Sleep is an excellent recalculator: more sleep = better recalculation.
3. Cry if you need to. (Contact your 5.)
4. It's tempting to be one of the boys, Marie cautions. Lots of women do this to be successful: imitate the way men do it. It's important not to lose who you are. (When you find this happening, route recalculate!)
She cited as an example Maine senator Susan Collins heading up the trio of women who solved the government shutdown conundrum.

"Remember: There is power is numbers," she concludes. "With one woman alone, it becomes all about hair, hemlines and husbands -- these are the primary areas of attack. When there are three or more, that stuff falls away."

A-ha! Hair again. If you haven't gleaned it by now, the real reason to have perfect hair... is to get it out of the way. You obviously have much more important things to do.
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Photo of Marie C. Wilson courtesy of TEDx Barnard Athena Center

Chanel's Native American Headdress On Runway Raises Eyebrows (PHOTOS)

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Chanel hit Dallas yesterday, staging a Texas-centric fashion show for its pre-fall collection -- which included Native American headdresses to accompany the "cowboys and Indians" theme. Cue the controversy.

While Karl Lagerfeld has yet to face a full-on backlash, Twitter has already begun to buzz with commentary about Chanel's controversial decision to send the headdress down the runway. "Can't wait for the think pieces on that Chanel Native American headdress," one user noted.

The preemptive tweet is certainly not off base. Karlie Kloss' Native American-style headdress in the 2012 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show caused the lingerie brand to issue an apology and pull the look from the show's broadcast. H&M was also forced to pull a feathered headdress after offending shoppers earlier this year. Then, of course, there was that ill-advised Native American-themed "Dream Catchin" party Paul Frank put on before controversy broke.

Now, as the skeptical reactions to Chanel's headdresses on Twitter suggest, the industry is conditioned to anticipate this kind of fashion misstep. But the backlash thus far against Chanel seems to pale in comparison to previous instances -- perhaps there are those fashion fans who believe that, in this case, showcasing a Native American-inspired headdress is acceptable. What's your take on the catwalk homage?

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Drama, drama...



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More Than Ever, We Need to Rethink How to Live Our Lives in Meaningful Ways Without Excessive Spending

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Rosehipswreath
Growing up, your holiday may have meant a special dinner with family or searching through gaily wrapped boxes for those bearing your name. Perhaps you cherish a familiar song you hear only when the weather turns crisp, music that reminds you of a simpler time surrounded by people you love.


For better or for worse in the United States, whether due to credit card debt, the foreclosure crisis, job loss or pay cuts, this holiday season many of us are forced by hard economic realities to reexamine our role as "consumers." More than ever, we must rethink how to live our lives in meaningful ways without excessive spending.

If this year finds you with strained finances or if you're simply growing concerned about your contribution to a sustainable planet, celebrating a Christmas and holiday focused on "gifts that give back" can help shift the focus from excess to caring for family and friends, our community and the world we share.

What do the holidays mean to you personally? What might you discover about yourself, your family or your friends if you planned your holiday differently? Would you get to know one another better or share your knowledge and skills with someone who needs your help or guidance?

Lessons of Generosity and Thoughtfulness
Making dramatic changes in your holiday routine may seem drastic, but small efforts do add up. Lynn Colwell, co-author of the book Celebrate Green says that much like recycling, once we get a feel for how easy it is to have a simpler holiday, it's hard to return to our old ways. She suggests starting one small step at a time.

"If you do it and I do it and everyone else does it, then it makes a big change, " she says.

Colwell insists most people ordinarily spend more extravagantly than they need to because we've come to believe it's the norm.

"We buy without thinking...we're all on autopilot," she says.

Long hours on the job leave us feeling overwhelmed. Standard marketing and advertising messages tell us we deserve a break. But there can be greater satisfaction from hard work than a life of luxury.

If you're a parent, you may wonder how to bestow lessons of generosity and thoughtfulness in your children's hearts. A simpler holiday is a wonderful way to provide your family with new and exciting traditions while providing an example for years to come. Kids love to help plan the family feast, bake and frost cookies, create decorations and wrap gifts. There seems to be no limit to their enthusiasm for the season.

Gift ideas long on play value include books, classics like wooden blocks, musical toys or instruments, building kits, art kits and art supplies, puzzles, dolls, board games, museum memberships, class/activity fees and science kits. Don't hesitate to peruse second- hand stores for kids' gifts, too. Many items there have been quickly outgrown before their usefulness has.

Clutter-free ideas include requesting baby-sitting, a special outing or a day trip for your kids with a family friend, aunt, uncle or grandparents.

Holiday Unshopping
Green America, a national nonprofit promoting social justice and a sustainable economy, suggests "unshopping" as a way to minimize impulse spending. They suggest holding potential purchases up to specific standards:

-Do I really need and want this? Can I get by without it?
-Is it made from renewable or nonrenewable resources? 
-Is it made of recycled materials and is it recyclable?
-How long will it last and how will I dispose of it?
-Can it be maintained and repaired?
-Could I borrow it, rent it, or buy it secondhand?
-Is it overpackaged?
-Is it worth the time I worked to pay for it and its cost to the environment?



Other unshopping ideas may include a book/magazine exchange or a cookie exchange: guests bring a dozen or two home- baked batches of cookies and their own tins, then each fills their tin with an assortment to bring home.

Organizing a toy exchange among families is great fun too, as many moms and dads prefer to pare down their child's toy collection before the holidays arrive. Consider giving your time and knowledge as gifts. If you're musical, offer friends music lessons for a month. Know how to knit? Help a friend on a new sweater pattern he/she always wanted to try.

Envying a garden of home-grown produce? Exchange your skills with a green-thumbed friend for help getting your veggie garden started. Have a way with words? How about resume help for a friend who's job hunting? Give a home-cooked meal in exchange for pet sitting. Great with numbers? You could offer tax-time help or accounting.

If you're time challenged but interested in giving an experience gift, consider theater or performance tickets, gift certificates for a much-needed spa service, fine dining or a bed-and-breakfast stay.

Buy Green, Buy Fair, Buy Local, Buy Used and Buy Less
To curtail spending, try the time-tested frugal tradition of a secret Santa exchange: a small group gets together, agrees on a price level and/or theme, they draw names, then each person gives a gift to another and gets a gift from another.

When purchasing new items, consider buying from local businesses, a community gift or craft fair, or social enterprises and nonprofit organizations that support green initiatives or benefit local residents.

Just a few of the many social enterprises and fair trade shops around Chicago include:

Beeline (beelinestore.com) helps men and women re-entering the community from prison establish a work history, good work habits, and gain skills to further employment through sales of their natural, honey-based, personal care products and all natural honey.

Sweet Miss Giving's (sweetmissgivings.com) is a bakery and jobs program that offers rich, decadent baked goods with over 50 percent of all profits going to help formerly homeless and HIV/AIDS-affected men, women, and children.


Bright Endeavors (brightendeavors.org) assists homeless and at-risk young women achieve self-sufficiency and independence through the production of Dreambean Candles, a line of eco-friendly and socially responsible candle products.

The Greenheart Shop (greenheartshop.org) and 10,000 Villages (tenthousandvillages.com) are nonprofit fair-trade shops that offer housewares, gifts, clothing and more.


Green Genes Boutique (green-genes.com) stocks eco-friendly and sustainable products for children and parents. All of their packaging and gift wrap are made from recycled and biodegradable materials.

To find more local businesses offering green and fair-trade goods and services visit Local FirstChicago.org  or ChicagoFairTrade.org.

Get Creative and Get Together
A décor swap is an easy way to refresh your home for the holiday. You can also make holiday décor out of items you already own. Create handmade cards and more using scraps of wrapping paper, old card fronts, buttons, felt, decorative paper, cardboard, construction paper, scrap yarn, fabric, flowers and fruit (real or faux) and decorative dishware. You may be surprised at how creative you can be with what you already own.

For gift wrapping, use recycled paper, comics, dish towels, receiving blankets, fashion scarves or make your own fabric gift bags. Children's gifts may be wrapped in colorful playsilks which can later be used for imaginative play and dress up. To wrap homemade treats, use recycled brown paper bags, decorated with stamping, paint or stickers.

Forget slaving over a hot stove and host a potluck. Make the gathering the focus over the getting. Include activities like music, caroling, games and crafts or ask each guest to bring an ornament to trim the tree.

Alternatives to hosting a bash include attending a worship service, a free concert or theater event or planning an outdoor activity like ice skating, sledding or visiting a winter festival. After the fun, gather indoors for hot cocoa and cider.

Spreading the Holiday Spirit and Cheer
When possible, extend your generosity to someone who needs extra help or support this season. ChicagoCares.org helps individuals, youth, families and groups locate volunteer opportunities around the city. Christopher House, an organization benefiting low-income children and families, holds an "adopt a family" program each holiday. Participants can learn more here.

Alternatively, you can give needed items on a charity's wish list or organize a donation among friends and family to a cause you collectively support. GiveForward.org, the brainchild of Chicagoans Desiree Vargas and Ethan Austin, makes it easy for anyone to set up a fundraising account online for causes both large and small.

While it's true the holidays come but once a year, perhaps this time, instead of facing traffic jams, long checkout lines and maxed-out credit cards, we can look upon the season as a celebration of possibility, a time for opportunity and a fresh start to a new year.


-Christine


This article originally appeared in Mindful Metropolis magazine.
photo credit: ali edwards, flickr

Ashton Kutcher Shares Personal Photo Of Him Kissing Mila Kunis

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With his divorce to Demi Moore finalized and behind him, Ashton Kutcher is officially free to flaunt his romance with girlfriend Mila Kunis.

On Tuesday (Dec. 10) the "Two and a Half Men" star tweeted out a rare personal photo of himself and Kunis kissing under a neon sign that said "SUN."




The pair, who played a teenage couple on "That '70s Show," have been dating since April 2012, and Kunis previously revealed that her first real on-camera kiss was with Kutcher.

"I was like, 'Oh, he's so cute, it's the Calvin Klein model!' ... Then I was like, 'I have to kiss him?' I was so nervous and uncomfortable. I had the biggest crush on him," she told People in 2001.

The couple was most recently spotted at Kunis' brother's wedding in St. Petersburg, Fla., on Dec. 7, where engagement rumors continued buzzing due to the gold band the 30-year-old actress has been wearing on that finger.

What Every New Mom Needs To Know About Makeup

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I went in knowing I needed help. I'm a new mom with not a lot of time on my hands. My skin is a wreck (thanks winter! thanks hormones!), and I have never really had an idea of how to do makeup to best highlight my features. Enter Rouge New York.

The brainchild of "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" actress Stephanie March and makeup artist Rebecca Perkins, Rouge New York sits in a cozy spot on Thompson Street. Despite the grey tufted fabric encasing the mirrors and the wood floors (oh, and the fact that it's owned by casually-glamorous people), you feel like you're in a fabulous friend's boudoir.

There are six chairs that line the perimeter (there will be a seating area complete with a table of 200 faux lipsticks and tons of magazines to help guide you). The lack of hair dryer noise also makes it feel calm. You can actually hear the DJ-picked tunes in the background. The whole thing is very Hollywood chic meets laid-back NYC cool.

When I sat down in the chair, which reclines all the way back if you need to catch a few winks, it was almost like the start of a therapy session. "I have horribly dry skin! Help," I said. Perkins immediately responded, "I'm so glad you're here, you can test out our squalene oil for your skin."

March and Perkins have not only created their own makeup but also brushes and skincare products for the salon. Turns out, Perkins has a two-and-a-half-year-old at home and nothing was working on her dry, hormonal skin, either. So she created a potion with squalene, which she claims is the most biosimilar to your skin's natural oils.

"Once you put squalene on, you don't have dry skin anymore," she said. And she was right. My skin felt super light.

The bar offers four main makeup treatments: You Only Better, Bold Choice, Total Polish and Touch Up. According to March, the whole point of the makeup bar is, "We don't want people to look at you and say, 'Oh, you got your makeup done.' We want people to say, 'Oh, you look great!"

Which treatment you get depends on how elaborate you want to go and how much time you have -- there's no precise formula here. I wanted to see what I could look like, yes, admittedly with a lot of help, but also easily and quickly enough. Per my request, I got You Only Better... with lashes.

rouge ny eyelash curler

Perkins started by patting primer softly on my face, and followed by applying contouring shadow underneath my brows, then gel eyeliner and mascara. She swears by L'Oreal Voluminous Mascara. "There's nothing better out there," she said. Perkins used a very warm (but not hot!) heated eyelash curler in lieu of the traditional curler to avoid dents, not to mention pulling out the false eyelashes she already applied.

As for foundation, she prefers to use her fingers on herself but a brush on clients. "I start with foundation because then you might need less concealer. The less makeup is better," said Perkins. On my cheeks and lips, she used Cheeky by Julie Hewitt. This is a great double-duty beauty trick for busy moms like myself.

rouge ny brush

To complete my makeover, Perkins spritzed a delicious and refreshing lavender mist on my face to help set the makeup.

rouge ny setting mist

What I enjoyed most was that Perkins never made me feel silly for asking basic beauty questions. When I told her I was "afraid" of black eyeliner, she calmly reminded me that: a) black eyeliner works well with someone who has dark hair like me to enrich the lash line, and b) I shouldn't be afraid of any makeup, as it all washes off anyway. Sitting there with the makeup artist was certainly a comfier, more personal approach to getting your makeup done. She was nothing like the product-pushers that I've experienced at beauty counters.

What's more, Rouge New York's hours are catered to working women. They're opened Monday through Friday, 7 a.m. to 8 p.m., Saturday, 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. on and Sunday, 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. "We want to be available to the professional woman. We want to be the power woman's morning spot," said Marsh.

While I did leave the salon feeling a bit more done up than I thought I would, everyone reassured me that I looked great and not overdone. ("Wow, your eyebrows!" was uttered to me more than once.) Mascara, concealer and a bold lip was all I needed to make me feel like a woman. A few hours in and the makeup held up well. Though the snow did make my eyeliner budge a bit. All in all, I do feel like me, but with more pizazz.

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Visit Rouge New York at 130 Thompson Street, New York, NY 10012. Follow them on Instagram and Twitter @Rouge_NY.

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Look 5 Years Younger Without Lasers

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We're firm believers that the best things in life get better with age: wine, cheese, George Clooney, a perfectly worn-in leather jacket... The list goes on. We’d also like to believe that when all is said and done, we as human beings get better with age as well. Life is a journey, after all, and we’d choose laugh lines over missed memory-making any day.

Madonna, Brahim Zaibat Split After Three Years Of Dating

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It looks like it just wasn't meant to be.

After three years of dating, Madonna and her much-younger boyfriend, Brahim Zaibat, have decided to call it quits, the singer's rep confirmed to Us Weekly.

The 55-year-old met Zaibat, 25, back in 2010 when he performed at the launch of Madonna's daughter Lourdes' Material Girl clothing line. He went on to land a gig as a backup dancer on the icon's MDNA tour -- after they were already dating, of course.

It remains unclear as to why the couple decided to part ways, but there have been reports that Zaibat may have already moved on, as the Daily Mail claims he's become very close to his professional partner Katrina Patchett on the French version of "Dancing With The Stars."

12 Natural Hair Gifts To Keep Your Favorite Girls With Curls Looking Fabulous (PHOTOS)

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While natural-haired dolls seem to be a hot item this holiday season, let's not forget about our own tresses. Ladies (and gents) with kinks and curls are always looking for the best products and gadgets around. Wouldn't it be grand to add a few of those items under the tree?

We've rounded up almost everything you'll need to keep their (or your) au natural curls fresh and fabulous in the year to come! Check 'em out!

'Harry Potter'-Themed Stilettos Exist (And We Want Them)

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Who knew Harry Potter-themed wedding shoes could be so... sexy?

Reddit user akasha446 posted these delightful pics on Tuesday with the caption, "Harry Potter shoes for my wedding."




According to the post, the shoes were hand painted by the bride's sister-in-law for the Big Day. As to who wore what? The bride got to rock the black Harry Potter and Hogwarts stilettos, while the bridesmaids each wore a pair representing the four houses: Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin.

Luckily, he who shall not be named never RSVP'd.



Kate Middleton's Temperley Repeat Is 10 Times Better With 3D Glasses (PHOTOS)

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Kate Middleton hasn't just found a go-to brand in Temperley, she's found a dress that will work again and again... and again.

The duchess took her favorite Temperley number, a black lace gown, out for a spin today at the screening of David Attenborough's Natural History Museum Alive 3D, proving that even royals three-peat when it comes to getting dressed for formal occasions. Kate first stepped out in the floor-length dress back in January 2012 for the premiere of "War Horse" before wearing it again in November of that year to a dinner at the University of St. Andrews, her alma mater.

"The duchess is an inspiration," designer Alice Temperley told The Telegraph this week. "She's very graceful, gracious and she's a brilliant ambassador for British fashion. She mixes up designer and high street; the perfect modern-day woman."

That every-woman appeal couldn't be more apparent than when Kate recycles her wardrobe just like the rest of us. (Don't even get us started on how many times we've worn the same dress to weddings, bar mitzvahs and holiday parties.) Plus, any woman who isn't afraid to rock 3D glasses with evening wear is cool in our book.

Kate in the gown today:

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Kate in November 2012:

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Kate in January 2012:

kate war horse

If it ain't broke...


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The Solution to Patriarchy? Pantene Says 'Shine!'

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This 1-minute commercial for Pantene, running in the Philippines, is getting a lot of praise. It does a powerful job of pointing out the way that women are disadvantaged in corporate contexts. The men and women in the ad are portrayed similarly, but the women are judged for the behavior while the men are praised.



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But then the end. Oh Pantene. The answer to this systemic double bind that damns women if they do and damns them if they don't is, apparently, to "be strong and shine."



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I suppose we shouldn't expect much more from a shampoo ad, but I lament the ending anyway. It resonates with a wider cultural trend in which feminist empowerment has been conflated with individual gain within a patriarchal system, not a collective effort to end patriarchy once and for all.



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This is the lesson of Sheryl Sandberg's Lean In: the system's all set up to fuck you over, she acknowledges, but then she whispers: I will try to help you get to the top anyway. No matter if you have to step all over lots of other women on the way. That's not feminism, that's self-interest. And it's certainly not progressive change.



Watch the commercial here:



Thanks to @yassmin_a at Redefining the Narrative, Keely W., and Jacob R. for the link!



Lisa Wade is a professor of sociology at Occidental College.

Erykah Badu Lands Givenchy's Spring 2014 Campaign Along With More Women Of Color (PHOTOS)

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Givenchy always pushes the envelope when it comes to its attention-grabbing ad campaigns. The French fashion house's creative director, Riccardo Tisci, has featured an albino model, a transsexual model and one of the world's chicest mother-and-daughter duos. This time around Tisci is tapping into his music industry ties by casting Erykah Badu in the Spring/Summer 2014 campaign.

We've been fans of the neo-soul singer's music and eccentric style for years -- so it's no surprise Tisci wanted her to strike a pose in a selection of Givenchy's upcoming Africa-meets-Japan themed collection.

SCROLL DOWN FOR PHOTOS

“Erykah, she’s an icon—come on!” Tisci told Style.com. “She’s one of the most stylish women I’ve met in my life. She’s got such a good sense of proportion, of colors.”

While Badu is a guaranteed crowd-pleaser, Tisci has also included Maria Borges, Asia Chow and up-and-coming beauty Riley (who we're guessing might be Eboni Riley) in the ads -- which means the entire campaign is modeled by women of color. Hooray!

Considering the accusations of racism on runways and the recent racial discrimination lawsuits against Barneys and Macy's, it's awesome to see a major fashion brand set an awesome example of inclusion. But then again, Tisci reminds us that Givenchy has consistently championed diversity.

"There was a lot of talk this season in fashion," the designer said. "I was one of the persons who ended up not being touched by this. I discovered Joan Smalls, I discovered Maria [Borges]. I've always been supporting them. For me, I grew up in a family and I grew up in a culture, an education, that we are all the same."

Furthermore, Ticsi hopes the images will help others embrace diversity within the industry -- an issue that even he believes has gotten out of control.

“It’s 2013. Everybody’s being so cool about Instagram, about Facebook, any media -- everybody’s being so open. At the end of the day, why are not so many black girls or Latin girls in shows? When you have an American president who is black! When I see this happening, it’s quite sad, I think. People can be so avant-garde, so advanced, but actually not, because people are still making differences between skin color.”

Agreed.

But, while we wait for the rest of fashion to get a clue... feast your eyes on this gorgeous shot of Ms. Erykah Badu getting her supermodel on for Givenchy's Spring/Summer 2014 campaign and a few Instagrams of her and Riccardo working their sartorial magic.

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Kourtney Kardashian: 'I've Been Thinking About How I'll Define Beauty' To My Daughter

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How young is too young for makeup?

It's a question pondered by parents, school administrators and young women themselves. It's also on Kourtney Kardashian's mind as she raises her 16-month-old daughter, Penelope. The reality star spoke candidly to Into The Gloss this week and mused on the role of makeup in her own childhood:

I've been wearing lipstick since I was in 7th grade. That was our form of daring self-expression, because we had to wear uniforms in school. It made our teachers so angry. Now that I have a daughter, I've been thinking about how I'll define beauty to her. I watched a video of Kendall when she was three, and she was putting on makeup. I don't know how I feel about that. But my daughter already watches me do it. When do you let them start wearing it? I don't know yet.


It might sound surprising coming from one of the Kardashians, they of the darkly-rimmed eyes, heavily-glossed lips and spray-tanned visages. But even Hollywood moms take the makeup question into consideration. Victoria Beckham told German magazine Icon, "I can't put on make-up when Harper’s around, because she would join me immediately." And Drew Barrymore took a more strongly-worded stance when asked about her daughter, Olive, earlier this year:

"Kids shouldn't wear makeup, I strongly feel that way... You should be a kid for as long as possible. I think when you start getting in your teens, then all bets are off, and you should just play, play, play. And figure out what kind of woman you want to be -- the training wheels are off. So kids in makeup, no. Starting in your teen years, absolutely go for it, and start to discover who you are."


But there are those famous moms who seem to have a different approach. Most memorably, Suri Cruise was spotted wearing lipstick alongside mum Katie Holmes, and Heidi Klum's daughters have worn some rather bright lip colors.

Whatever parents and their kids choose is, well, their own choice -- and many women, like Kourtney, might not know exactly how they even feel. What's your take on little girls in makeup?

Makeup or not, celeb kids sure are cute:


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Even Celebrities Love Ugly Christmas Sweaters

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Aint no party like an ugly sweater party, 'cause an ugly sweater party don't stop!

Seriously -- can something go out of style if it was never actually "in" style? That's the beauty of the tacky Christmas sweater. It's universally love-hated and everybody's got one. Take some inspiration from your favorite celebrities and television characters as you gear up for the annual festivities.


How to Chose Quality Over Quantity

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You know you when you get to that point in your life when you feel overwhelmed?

It's true. We all get there. I still go there. We get into the space of: "How am I really going to do it all?"

As women, we have more and more opportunities every day that we can step into. How do we get there? Where do we go?

When we go into overwhelmed mode, we sometimes need a reminder that it's okay to gift ourselves permission as a woman to keep expanding.

This is what I do and I want to share it with you. It's a simple exercise that will assist you in getting through these points in your life, and help you receive the clarity you need to design your life in a way that is unique to you.

It's about quality versus quantity.

What things in your life do you have, just because? What things are really lasting? I know in my life, it has to be more about the quality of the experience (or thing or person) than the quantity.

I am always expanding into luxury, beauty and deeper relationships. Here are two ways you can deepen your relationship with yourself, and the the woman you are here to become.

1. Make a list the things that you know are quantity. The relationships, the clothing, the things you love.

2. Make a list in your life that are just about quality.

Then start giving yourself permission to to clear the things that are quantity-based.

Every time you get overwhelmed, let go of more of the "quantity" and begin to choose the "quality".

Let me know how this experience is for you. Share the insights that you have. What are the quality pieces in your life?


Visit me at www.elegantfemme.com for more tips and techniques on how to have more beauty, prosperity and balance if your life.

Miley Cyrus Knows How To Do Christmas

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Looks like Miley Cyrus is taking her sexy Christmas show on the road, because after her performance in L.A. last weekend, she rocked Atlanta’s Jingle Ball dressed like Santa again.

A Magical Miracle Just Happened to Me and I Have to Share It

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A magical miracle just happened to me when a turquoise blue ostrich feather fell from heaven and landed on my upstate New York mountaintop cabin doorstep.

I had been up in the log cabin alone for a week designing dresses and resting for my next HSN TV appearance. I was launching my first TV fragrance and had been told by experts that selling on air something that you can't smell was nearly impossible. That warning struck a worry cord.

I love the total quiet of a week alone in the cabin and now before I go on TV and I like to sit in front of the New York mountain top view of the misty blue Catskill mountain range and do yoga mediation and feel the peace.

This particular early November morning was my last day. The skies were baby blue. The trees were all the colors of red, wine and orange and the leaves were falling in my hair as I sat and meditated on the chaise on the deck by the front door enjoying the last moments of fall colors before winter white sets in. Some fear of failure passed in my mind and I prayed intensely and asked God to help me with my new perfume launch. The perfume, 21 Bonaparte was named after my shop address in Paris that I had opened with partners, Mia Fonssagrives and Elizabeth Taylor in the sixties.

I had worked in Paris since 1964. In the late eighties Elizabeth and I decided to do our own fragrances. We had been advised to do so in a 1970 dinner with Coco Chanel just before her death. That night Coco gave us the best advise of our lives. Her greatest success, she told us, was the Chanel No 5 perfume and it had financed her all her life. Fashions come and go, she told us, a great fragrance is forever!

I set off in 1987 for Egypt where perfume originated in 1000 BC. The word perfume derived from the Latin word meaning "through smoke" as the first perfumes were made in Cyprus blending by smoke many natural aromatics, oils, water and alcohol. I copied the original bottle colors of the Queen of Egypt's amphors which I bought at the Cairo museum and took them back to the atelier of Pierre Dinand, the French master bottle designer.

Today, 11 perfumes and 22 years later, including best sellers, Sirene for women and Ulysses for men, I had a chance to sell fragrance on TV and speak to an audience about the power of femininity and it's relation to how we look and how we smell.

I asked in my last mediation of the fall to the heavens above to give me your blessings. After a few hours outside I returned to the cabin to find a miracle on the deck, a brilliant four inch long turquoise blue ostrich feather lay at the front door.


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I picked it up and was amazed to find there was no bird ever in upstate New York in this electric blue green color. It seemed to be the color of a rare African bird or a dyed feather off a 1920s hat. The only problem was there were no vintage shops in the windy mountain top nor any fashionable ladies with feathered flapper dresses. WHERE DID THE FEATHER COME FROM?

It was a magical miracle. I put the feather in my purse and decided to carry it with me forever.

On the airplane to Tampa the next morning with my eyes closed while soaring between the blue clouds I realized the feather was the same color as my original Egyptian perfume, bottles that were the color I found in Egypt researching my first perfume, riding camels and visiting the great magical Pyramids. Suddenly I realized the feather from above was dropped at my door by pal Elizabeth Taylor who recently went to heaven.


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Elizabeth loved hot pink, lavender and turquoise and she really loved ostrich feathers. She even ordered a ostrich feather minidress from me to wear at a UNICEF party in Paris in 1969 when she and Richard Burton performed together on stage. Richard wore his costume from Candy a film I was doing the costumes, the film I made for the actress who played Candy, Eva Aulin, the first wrap dress, the dress we sell the most of all my designs on HSN TV.

The turquoise feather was a sign from Elizabeth, "Wake up Vicky, don't worry," I'm still here nearby and you will be fine!

I was more than fine on TV. I rocked. The perfume launch of 21 Bonaparte went so well we sold out! Joy and Regis Philbin surprised me and phoned in. I had given Joy one of the first bottles and Regis loved it. The scent was super sexy, lots of dramatic Patchouli offset with tender white flowers and had been tested for months by my mother's nurses from Alabama, real gals with real desires to please their men and I had been told by the nurses,"This is one for the Ages," when they returned a tester completely empty.


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Do you believe in miracles? Do you believe we are watched over by our departed friends and loved ones? Now I do.

Vicky Tiel began designing clothes 40 years ago in Paris and still owns a boutique there. See Vicky and her new collection on HSN and online. Her couture is available at Bergdorf Goodman and Neiman Marcus, and her perfumes are carried in Perfumania. Her memoir, It's All About the Dress: What I Learned in 40 Years About Men, Women, Sex and Fashion was published by St. Martin's Press in August 2011.

Cressida Bonas Wears Awesome Boots We'd Like To Borrow (PHOTOS)

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She may be Kate Middleton's potential sister-in-law, but Cressida Bonas has a decidedly un-royal fashion sense. Prince Harry's girlfriend is bringing back the scrunchie hardcore, she loves her some overalls and she once wore wedge sneakers (after that, it was all over for us -- we were in love).

Cressie nailed it once again today while out shopping for what we assume were Christmas gifts (for Harry??). The 24-year-old's got the statement coat nailed in a flippy magenta style, but the highlight is surely the black boots, understated but with a gold-tipped buckle across the middle to keep interesting.

In short, this is another Cressida outfit we'd like to borrow. Think if once she and Harry get hitched, she'll come on tour stateside and give us Americans a taste of her anti-Kate style?

PHOTOS:

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Cressy's got style in spades:


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Gift Guide: Travel Memories (Or Make New Ones)

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Holiday Lights on Philadelphia's Jewelers Row (photo by J. Fusco for Visit Philadelphia)


Gifting is hard work, but I'm here to help you give meaningful items to ensure that you win Christmas the recipient delights in your thoughtful present.

The idea: Buy gifts that are iconic to or come from a place you've visited with your partner, friend, or family member. Some examples to get your wheels turning:

Relive that quintessential New Orleans breakfast by ordering Café Du Monde coffee and beignet mix. The tempting smells will transport your loved one right to Decatur Street. It says, "Remember those Hurricanes and flying beads? Me neither. Let's not talk about that anymore."

Been to Philadelphia lately? I'm sure you had your fill of the Liberty Bell and brotherly love. Give these Philly pint glasses to your travel companion, and over a drink, reminisce about yelling "Yo Adrian!" much to the dismay of the leering locals. Bonus: They're from the lesbian-owned We Heart Philly line.

Share the spirit of the season with Chicago-born Halsted Vodka. It's perfect for your favorite airport-bar drinking buddy. Plus, the mission is on point: 15% of profits go towards LGBTQ causes. A refreshing gift for your loved one and the whole community.

Art thrives in Santa Fe, where ancient and edgy blend to create a colorful community. Browse Santa Fe's Ventana Fine Art and choose a print, sculpture, poster, or book from the 20-year-old gallery, located on the city's famed and art-heavy Canyon Road.

Want to evoke high-quality craft lifestyle? Look to Portland's Tanner Goods for beautiful, made-to-order leather items. No, not that kind of leather. Think seasonal gifts, such as deerskin leather gloves, and travel must-haves (or, want-to-haves) like luggage tags, camera straps and hiking boot bags.

My favorite travel-related gift: more travel! On December 25, my partner and I give each other nothing, which is really the promise of something great to come. Instead of dropping money on each other now, we plan a winter escape for two. I need a tan, not another sweater.

For all your travel-planning needs, use fagabond.com.
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